Hillary's exit speech

I watched Hillary's exit speech...she extended her full support to obama now that she is conceding...hmmmm...she urgedt her voters extend their support to him...for some reason..I was moved by her exit speech..though perhaps she rehearsed much the prior evening or perhaps she meant it all to be deliberately mushy..but perhaps she was sincere too...I shed a single tear for some reason.>I am not usually this sillly person who get emotional with no logical backing towards feeling a certain emotion...but , well..she is not in the race
Obama is...for one...I instinctively feel that all he is good at is participating in debates and speaking sweet speeches...
The presidential election process must be less of a DEBATING OR PUBLIC SPEAKING COMPETITION AND MORE OF ACTUAL DATA ANALYSIS IN TERMS OF PUTTING THE WORDS INTO ACTUALLY ACTIONS...unfortunately ..it is all about money laundering and public acting competitions ...Who cares...This is the country that reelected bush ...and yet keeps blaming him for everything...come on...suck it up...every single person in this country has had a role in the economic recession..dropping out of high school and getting pregnant, reading gossip magazines about the lives of entertainers who are high school drop outs themselves and who are also pregnant themselves..if everyone passes on doing something really science related..the country is going to end up a third world country..the people need to change their priorities in life..Have some respect for education and science and technology and pitch in too..seriously !

Nicholas Cage, Elvis presley and me ,Face patterns and choices

Hmmmm..I first watched Nicholas Cage in Moon struck and the laid back tone of the movie by itself really appealled to me and therefore i kinda fell in a crush with Nicholas Cage.
Later i discovered Elvis' music and fell in love with everything about it .Incidentally i purchased an Elvis Audio cassette just coz it had his face on him and his face at that time totally resembled someone that i was considering dating on a long term basis(which i didn't though due to other reasons) .So, then i realized that Nicholas Cage kinda constantly reminded me of Elvis which made me like him even more.
The funny thing is, Nicholas incidentally got married to Elvis' daughter for a short period of time and it is rumored that they seperated coz his daugther found out that Nicholas cage was more into Elvis himself than her and adored Elvis so much that he thought that marrying his daughter would be the next best thing.Needless to say the marriage ended.PLEASE REMEMBER THAT THIS PIECE OF NEWS IS ONLY A RUMORED NEWS(MAY NOT EVEN BE TRUE) ...
So yeah, Just incase it is true.well, we have something to think about .The thing that sometimes when we like people instantly just by taking a single look at them, we perhaps are making a far more compatible choice instintively for ourselves than we are after deciding on someone after spending ages with them interacting with them.I am not sure.But somewhere , animals instinctively know what is right for them or not just by taking a look >Can that be true?
I heard or read somewhere that humans choose people when they are shown a series of pictures , the humans that most likely are also going to instintively choose them back too if shown a series of pictures too.(this excludes pictures of stereotyped so callled pretty entertainer pictures because those people don't count coz those faces are far too familiar to be included in a series of pictures of unknown people)
Anyways, I need to stop rambling

Being a vegetarian guest at meat parties !

I am a vegetarian..
But, you see, I am such a nice person, people can't help trying to make friends with me (giggles uneasily !)..

I get invited to dinner parties, barbeque parties and what not ..yeah, the birthday parties.

I have to reiterate, I am not an antisocial person.

But, but, i don't eat meat, and i don't drink and i hate smoking.hmmmmm..
I hate looking at wasted people making a fool of themselves, and i don't want to be part of a dinner where someone already bled and killed and slaughtered an animal and is eating it with relish...

 What do i do?

Each time i get invited, i end up making an excuse as to why i can't come or how i won't be able to make it...hmmmmm..
.now...i don't want to mention the actual reason why i don't want to dine with them" the reason that i am a vegetarian teetotaller "
because
 i don't care to involve in arguments about the food chain and carnivores and other such stuff..
seriously..I don't care..

For some reason, Non vegetarians , once they know you are a vegetarian, automatically are inclined to want to start an argument with you even if you are not one of those PETA type of people.
I wonder why !

Some kind of guilt mechanism..

I am not sure.I am only telling myself, " I am making decisions for my life.Why is my decision making you want to start an argument with me?"

anyways...Each time, someone is on the verge of inviting me somewhere, I am cringing..and telling myself,"oh no...not one more invitation, again !"

I am starting to think that i must start saying this perhaps, "0h , but i am a vegetarian,!" and then perhaps they might just out of courtesy(cursing themselves for having invited me in the first place, go ahead and offer to cook something vegetarian especially for me.

Ofcourse, then, just coz they were taking that extra trouble for me, i accept the invitation and then i go .

Ofcourse, I am treated like an alien, all coz i decided not to slaughter an animal for my dinner.Hmmmm.

Then ofcourse , they start discussing me behind my back , as to how much of a trouble guest i am and how they are needing to accomodate for me..(yeah right, kill the animals.. yeah kill them,look who is accomodating, The animal kingdom.Yeah , like they have a choice !)

Hmmmmm.,,,A long pause and then finally i decide that the next time , i get invited , i have to politely refuse..

Can fellow vegetarians give me politically correct refusal statements..please?
So yeah,what do i do?

Real conviction moves me !

What moves me the most?
Real conviction that makes one do something about it .Truly with all their heart.
I automatically have so much respect for people who actually act upon their conviction in the real sense .There are a lot of people who want someone else to do the dirty and difficult job, All they want to do is open up another blog site to collect money or some celebrity who will perform for some charity or someone who goes and pays a cursory visit to a cancer patient and they almost think that just their divine presence is the greatest gift they could give to that child suffering from cancer( a god complex i suppose)..well..that is not true conviction.Real conviction is about getting down and dirty about it..REally doing it..REally going down there and really participating and really doing stuff out there ... ya know !
Like going there and actually helping built a house for the katrina victims...Actually go there and act at the grassroot level... I don't like people using the excuse of time..Everyone can make time for things they think are important.

You just need one other person like you to feel at home!

I was watching the guy on whom the movie "the insider" is based on , and they ask him if he is lonely and for a moment he muses over it and says "No ! NO, I am not lonely "
Hmmm..He is man , who tried to take up on a corrupt, money greedy,Tobacco industry and hmmmm..Suddenly a thought flashed my mind ,"Sometimes, when one is a person with a deep conviction of what is right and what is wrong, where most people won't live up to our ideals, All we need is one other person who thinks and acts like us and we will never feel alone" and feeling alone is such a bad thing.hmmm

My comment about women being patronized at work!

I left a comment for peggy on her blog "Women in Science" On one of her blog entries where she relates this story of a smart female programming geek who automatically  got ignored for the longest time because all the men there assumed that she probably was someone who accompanied a male geek to that gathering.
I myself have experienced similar things at work and therefore,I left a comment there .

Here goes a copy of the comment i left for her there(comment slightly paraphrased down below)
Believe it or not, I have experienced so many such similar situations.Male colleagues start off with talking to me in a patronizing manner and start trying to explain to me how to do MY job.Sometimes it gets irritating when they give me tips and those tips basically suck and they have this demeanour where they present the tips to me as in they are only trying to help the "poor me" out.
Why would they assume that I won't know how to do my job is what I find very sad .It takes extra effort to get over that initial snub and let them know that I know better and can and will and have performed better than them even in most work situations.
Gender has nothing to do with competence.
People, IRRESPECTIVE of their gender, are either COMPETENT  or INCOMPETENT,dedicated to their job OR not!

These PATRONIZING MEN have been socially conditioned to look down upon women in general .
Sometimes Ironically,These are also the same men who have been socially conditioned to OPEN DOORS for women, and PULL OUT CHAIRS for women and TAKE CARE of the women in their lives.
WTF !!
Don't these women have hands? Can't they open their own doors, pull out their own chairs and look after themselves? I would rather have a man who just respects my intelligence and is there for me emotionally and someone who shares all chores , and let me open my own door..I have hands, I can and will open my own doors.

These PATRONIZING men were also AUTOMATICALLY CONDITIONED ,perhaps mostly due to the kind of women they have been used to being around at home during their childhood and all through their formative years.Constantly being exposed to submissive,financial dependant women during formative years allows them to presume that all women are dependant victims.First impressions are such lasting impressions on the mind.

This includes the SUBMISSIVE FINANCIALLY DEPENDANT MOTHER they probably had, or other such adult female figures with submissive qualities  that they came across all through their formative years.These women must have treated the men in their lives like superiors or some such and that EXPECTATION to be treated and talked to like a superior has STUCK in their minds.

As a woman in a society that assumes that "women and children" need to be "protected"(protected from whom and what and how?), I end up needing to go out of MY way to make sure these men respect me rather than just patronize me .

I have to,at times , needed to say out loud ,"Hey, I have the same educational degree as you and I am sure I would know how to do that  job just as much(if not better)than you would know how to do it!" and yet, it is still tough sometimes,needing to defend my talents like that .

But then, let me tell you, such "patronizing reactions" have often happened to me only AT THE BEGINNING of me entering a new place .Once people get to know me, they also end up understanding how talented and smart I am and I have then had Male colleagues often ask for my second opinion in all of their tough cases.Feels good, that, to be respected for what I am worth.

Coming back to SOCIAL CONDITIONING .It paves way for what men think they can or should assume a female colleague can or cannot accomplish,irrespective of what she can ACTUALLY ACCOMPLISH.

As more and more smart women give birth to children and as these children of such smart independent women grow up watching strong smart mothers at their homes, maybe the gender dynamics will change.Both female and male children,when they grow up watching financial dependant smart tough women, they grow up knowing that women can do things on their own.

Jealousy is such an uncontrolled emotion , Isn't it?

Jealousy i ssuch an uncontrolled emotion , Isn't it?
I for most part don't really get gripped by jealousy coz i tend to admire someone else's achievements with a healthy spirit that gets me inspired to do better .Morever the things i cherish and respect are things worth respecting.I am not really into a certain kind of face and nose.I am more into intelligence, originality and goodwill.
But, there are those very rare times , when i have suddenly caught myself get a teenie weenie bit jealous too.Just a lil while ago, i saw a picture of a man whom i have never met in person.I kinda like him(i rarely end up liking people without meeting them in person and i rarely like people unless they have taken my third degree vindication !).So yeah, i saw a picture of him with his apparently new found love.This new found love of his, seems like a very normal person.Nothing spectacular and not someone that meets my Special Intelligent person standard.My heart sank for a bit.Was is jealousy ? Or was it disappoitment that this man that i like a bit more than usual, selects such an ordinary person to be with? I have no idea.Really .I mean, Maybe if he had been with someone special and spectacular and more intelligent and some whom i would find appealing myself, I perhaps would not have experienced that sinking feeling i felt in my heart(which i suppose was a jealousy of some kind?) hmmm...Never mind.

For most part, on an average, i don't get jealous because i am kinda proud of who i am .I would think that jealousy stems from insecurity and an insecurity where a person feels that they cannot do anything to correct and set right that factor that causes them to feel insecure.Hmmmm.
I have seenNot-so-good looking people get jealous of others who look good coz for most part, they look at it as something they cannot correct about themselves. and sometimes i have seen people taking this jealousy overboard and actually trying horrible methods like body modification to make themselves look better.
My question is, plastic surgery might modify your external looks, but will it ever get rid of the insecurity and the ensuing jealousy inside your head?
I BET ,NO !
The insecurity that is inherent will never go away till you do away with your own silly and stupid definitions of good and great and nice .
I would highly suggest that people dwell on each of us being unique rather than each of us meeting up to a set standard of what is great..why? well,, the person that decides that they are not ideal looking, does so out of some of self disapproval and some inner insecurity about their looks.They get plastic surgery done , they might even end up looking exactly like what they wanted to look like.Yet, the very fact, they need to undergo surgery to look that perfect, constanly stays in their mind and constantly makes them feel even bad that they were never "idea"l looking in the first place.Inside of their head, each time , after surgery, anyone compliments them on their looks, It is like a subconscious slap on their face , almost something that sounds like , "Hey , you are actually bad looking,Look, you needed surgery to look good, You were never really good looking in the first place!"
The solution?People need to respect themselves first, respect their own selves enough to not be shallow enough to respect beauty beyond even their self respect and respect for personality, to go get surgery.They need to feel proud and adequate about themselves without makeup, without all those extra add ons.That is true healing.

Kenny G and magic !

I was first introduced to Kenny G's magic more than a decade ago (15yrs ago?Not sure ) when i watched the grammy's award night ,way back then. Those were some days..when i was just starting to be a teenager.
I went an purchased some Kenny G audio cassettes with the money i saved from my Gas money..Hmmm....
Kenny G has this magical soothing effect on me..where within minutes of starting to listening to the sax... i slowly go into the semi hypnotic mode and then after sometime , all i am doing is closing my eyes , and letting out satisfactory semigroans(no obscenity or sexual connotations intended at all) .
The Saxaphone by itself has a calming effect i suppose, but kenny somehow adds the depths to those already calming tones.
Years went by after that , and over those years, i moved on to Elvis, and REM and George Michael( i know i know..I moved to artists in a retrospective manner- but, hey, I am born much later than these artists, I still have the right to go back and discover their music and love them, don't I?), I move on to savage garden and a many other singers, songwriters and composers and As of now, IN 2008, MY LAPTOP still has kenny somewhere on its music collection but i never get myself around to actually listen to him anymore.
Just three days ago that changed, Finally ! I went back and looked at all my music archives, dished out the kenny G and clicked on PLAY, and within two minutes I was back in that semi nirvana state where i am going all "OH , wow, OH my god ,this is so great ! "

About priorities and prizes !

This is a comment i left on J's blog(reblog on try JM) and as it happens each time, My comments end up being spontaneous and deeper than i deliberately intended them to be-BTW, all my comments are honest and non malicious and are written as an attempt to discuss and provide my two cents on the issue being discussed and none of it meant as a biting acidic shite talking or anything.K?
so here goes a copy of my comment that i left on there on JM's blog entry about Goonies and troys ....Hmmm

Le cinq blog said...
I wonder why "jewels", "smoking hot girlfriend/s" ,"badass Mustang/s" are percieved or potrayed as the ultimate comebacks in movies or otherwise.They are projected as the 'ultimate achievement' to prove that one has done something in life.Hmmmm...I guess , what a mustang is for someone is what a long peaceful trek along a trail with no worries on the mind is for another(aka ME).To each one their own ,and ,therefore ;i kinda don't get the stereotypical generalizations of what is supposed to be the ultimate measure of success or happiness namely the mustangs and what not.hmmmmMaybe i am different .sighs
June 1, 2008 11:18 AM(this date is wrong coz tha blogger has it set to german time or some such )